Spread the love

Joe Stramondo and his wife, Leah, could have been any other 30-something couple hoping for a child as they sat answering questions in a doctor’s office. They had miscarried once before, when Leah was seven weeks along, and they were desperate for a baby; Leah eagerly, if nervously, answered questions about her health and life as Joe sat by her side. When the subject of her height came up, however, her husband grabbed the opportunity to lighten the mood.

‘Three eleven and a half,’ Leah told the doctor.

‘The half’s real important – make sure you get that on there,’ joked Joe, who is shorter than his wife.

Because both husband and wife, who now live in San Diego, have dwarfism; their fight for a child is chronicled in documentary Far From The Tree, which is coming to theaters in limited release this weekend. The film follows a number of families in which the children are vastly different from their parents, touching upon everything from autism and homosexuality to Down syndrome and dwarfism.

The story of Leah and Joe is a particularly heartwarming one, and it has a very happy resolution; the film ends with the birth of their daughter, Hazel, who just so happens to not have dwarfism. And things have only gotten more exciting since then; just a few weeks ago, Leah gave birth to a second baby, Silas – who also does not have the same condition as his parents.

Joe Stramondo, 36, and his wife Leah, 37, both have dwarfism – but neither their toddler daughter, Hazel, nor their newborn son, Silas, was born with the condition
Joe, who is an assistant professor of philosophy, and Leah, who works in media and advocacy, are now based with their children in San Diego; they are featured in new documentary Far From the Tree, which explores families in which children are vastly different from their parents
The film stems from the 2012 book of the same name by Andrew Solomon, right, who became interested in the nature of families after his parents struggled to accept his homosexuality; director Rachel Dretzin, left, read the book and says it'stirred me in such a deep way that I was sort of like, “I’m going to make this movie”’
The film stems from the 2012 book of the same name by Andrew Solomon, right, who became interested in the nature of families after his parents struggled to accept his homosexuality; director Rachel Dretzin, left, read the book and says it’stirred me in such a deep way that I was sort of like, “I’m going to make this movie”’

‘It was really, really emotional,’ says director Rachel Dretzin, who spent years following Joe and Leah and the other families featured in the film. ‘I have to say, Joe and Leah are even more fabulous than they are on screen – and it was such a privilege to spend so much time with them, privy to such intimate moments in their life. We were actually there when [Hazel] was born.

‘We’d seen them go through heartbreak after heartbreak; it was just thrilling.’

The film came about following the 2012 publication of a best-selling book by the same name, written by author Andrew Solomon, who got the idea to investigate unusual family dynamics from his personal experience as a gay man whose parents struggled to accept his orientation.

‘I thought, “I don’t want to know just about families of gay people; I wanted to look as widely as I could,”’ Solomon says in the film, detailing his ‘attempt to investigate how families go about dealing with children who are very different from them.’

‘I spent ten years researching and writing this book … The stories I heard felt so alien at the beginning, but bit by bit they came to feel very real and very intimate to me.

‘I realized that, in telling these stories, I was investigating the very nature of family itself.’

Dretzin became interested in making the documentary after coming across a review of Solomon’s book.

‘I was just so struck by the humanity of the story, and I immediately thought, “Wow, this sounds like it would make an incredible film,”’ she tells DailyMail.com. ‘And then I read the book, and I was even more taken with it. It just stirred me in such a deep way that I was sort of like, “I’m going to make this movie.”’

She and her team contacted various families and earned their trust, eventually convincing them to let the film follow their lives – and now many are counted as friends, such as Joe and Leah. The filmmakers accompanied them on trips to see Leah’s family in Texas and Joe’s in Connecticut and to the annual Little People of America Convention, as well as sitting the couple down to hear their backstory.

‘Joe and I met back in the days of MySpace,’ says Leah, 37, who works as a media and entertainment advocate for the Center for Disability Rights as well as director of public relations for Little People of America. ‘I had seen his MySpace page, and I read everything he wrote on there – and he didn’t just write, “My name is Joe;” he wrote like his entire political beliefs about everything you can imagine.’

She thought: ‘Holy smokes, this guy is fascinating.’

‘And I made, like, this mental note: I’m going to meet him. That was all there was to it: I want to meet this guy,’ she says. ‘So I knew I was interested in him immediately. And then it kind of took us a while, took us two years before we got serious. We dated for four years, and then we got married.

‘I had dated some average-height people and tried to stay open-minded about it, but I just found that they didn’t get me, and I don’t know that there’s anyone who gets me the way he does,’ she says of Joe, who uses a wheelchair because his limbs are underdeveloped. ‘I love his dwarfism. It’s something that we say: “I like your ‘ism.”

‘There’s certain characteristics involved with every type of dwarfism, and for achondroplasia, it’s having bigger hips … so Joe will walk up to me in a public space [and] whisper to me: “I like your ‘ism,” meaning “I like you’re a**,”’ she laughs, as Joe playfully sings the Sir Mix-A-Lot hit Baby Got Back in the background.

The film follows the struggle of Joe and Leah to conceive after she miscarried at seven weeks; the filmmakers were present when Leah eventually gave birth to Hazel, who is average sized 
The film follows the struggle of Joe and Leah to conceive after she miscarried at seven weeks; the filmmakers were present when Leah eventually gave birth to Hazel, who is average sized 
Director Dretzin, who spent significant time with the family while filming the documentary, says that, while there are 'some physical limitations' for Joe - who uses a wheelchair -  'he just figures it out. And it’s kind of amazing to see all of the different ways he figures it out. It just doesn’t slow him down'
Director Dretzin, who spent significant time with the family while filming the documentary, says that, while there are ‘some physical limitations’ for Joe – who uses a wheelchair –  ‘he just figures it out. And it’s kind of amazing to see all of the different ways he figures it out. It just doesn’t slow him down’
The couple discuss the possibility of having a child with or without dwarfism in the film, before they find out that Hazel was born without it; Leah says: 'I have a desire for a little person, but if we had an average-size child, I think I will still get it on a level, because I understand what it’s like to be different than your family’
The couple discuss the possibility of having a child with or without dwarfism in the film, before they find out that Hazel was born without it; Leah says: ‘I have a desire for a little person, but if we had an average-size child, I think I will still get it on a level, because I understand what it’s like to be different than your family’
Before the birth of Hazel, pictured here with her parents, Joe says: 'Whether or not the baby will be born with a disability is, of course, something that we’ve thought about somewhat ... It’s certainly something that the doctors talk about a lot. I think they see normality as the end goal, and just sort of assuming that normality is what any parent would want for their child' 
Before the birth of Hazel, pictured here with her parents, Joe says: ‘Whether or not the baby will be born with a disability is, of course, something that we’ve thought about somewhat … It’s certainly something that the doctors talk about a lot. I think they see normality as the end goal, and just sort of assuming that normality is what any parent would want for their child’ 

‘I think there is this cultural understanding that, when you see people like me, the core of the experience is negative,’ Joe says. ‘And when people have low expectations, it’s surprising to them when I indicate somehow that I’m not suffering.

An assistant professor in philosophy, he’s quick with a joke and lights up the screen in the documentary, imitating a nature narrator such as David Attenborough as he picnics with Leah in a park and quips: ‘Here’s the dwarf in his natural habitat. He’s taking his afternoon meal.’

Both husband and wife are keen advocates for disability rights.

‘Personally, I’m against the idea that someone is researching to find a cure for my type of dwarfism,’ Leah says in the film. ‘It’s the same message that we get our whole lives – that there’s something wrong with you and we need to fix it. I don’t think I need to be fixed.’

As she and Joe pursue a viable pregnancy, it’s an issue they address with candor on camera.

‘Whether or not the baby will be born with a disability is, of course, something that we’ve thought about somewhat,’ says Joe, 36. ‘It’s certainly something that the doctors talk about a lot. I think they see normality as the end goal, and just sort of assuming that normality is what any parent would want for their child.’

His wife adds: ‘I think that every parent has a desire for their ideal child – you know, like some people, it’s like: “I really want a girl.” But if they have a boy, it’s not the end of the world. So I have a desire for a little person, but if we had an average-size child, I think I will still get it on a level, because I understand what it’s like to be different than your family.’

That’s exactly what ended up happening – not just once, but twice, with both the couple’s newborn son and two-year-old daughter. There is a 25 percent chance that both parents with dwarfism will have an average-sized child.

‘I was out in Los Angeles – I think it was January – and they drove up with Hazel and we spent an evening together,’ Dretzin tells DailyMail.com. ‘She’s walking, talking; she’s still not taller than they are, but she will be pretty soon. What’s amazing about them – actually about pretty much everybody in the film – is that they forget about these differences really quickly. It’s just minor.

‘For Joe and Leah, it’s just not a big deal. I mean, I’m sure their kids are going to be very political and aware about all disability-related issues, but I find it hard to imagine there could be any real limit to what Joe and Leah could do. Obviously, [the children] are going to be a lot bigger than they are.

‘There are some physical limitations for Joe, in particular, because he’s in a chair; he can’t pick Hazel up. But … he just figures it out. And it’s kind of amazing to see all of the different ways he figures it out. It just doesn’t slow him down.’

She adds: ‘They’re just intrepid … They’re just a delight. They’re so much fun and so smart.’

Joe and Leah met 'back in the days of MySpace' when she came across his page; they dated for years and then got married. She says: ‘I had dated some average-height people and tried to stay open-minded about it, but I just found that they didn’t get me, and I don’t know that there’s anyone who gets me the way he does’
Joe and Leah met ‘back in the days of MySpace’ when she came across his page; they dated for years and then got married. She says: ‘I had dated some average-height people and tried to stay open-minded about it, but I just found that they didn’t get me, and I don’t know that there’s anyone who gets me the way he does’
Joe, pictured at his First Holy Communion in his home state of Connecticut; he says in the film: ‘I think there is this cultural understanding that, when you see people like me, the core of the experience is negative,’ Joe says. ‘And when people have low expectations, it’s surprising to them when I indicate somehow that I’m not suffering'
Joe, pictured at his First Holy Communion in his home state of Connecticut; he says in the film: ‘I think there is this cultural understanding that, when you see people like me, the core of the experience is negative,’ Joe says. ‘And when people have low expectations, it’s surprising to them when I indicate somehow that I’m not suffering’
Joe, pictured with his diploma, pursued a career in higher education and now teaches at San Diego State University; his sense of humor, wit and deep love for his wife shine through in Far From the Tree
Joe, pictured with his diploma, pursued a career in higher education and now teaches at San Diego State University; his sense of humor, wit and deep love for his wife shine through in Far From the Tree
Leah, pictured left as a girl, says in the film: ‘Personally, I’m against the idea that someone is researching to find a cure for my type of dwarfism. It’s the same message that we get our whole lives - that there’s something wrong with you and we need to fix it. I don’t think I need to be fixed’
Leah, pictured left as a girl, says in the film: ‘Personally, I’m against the idea that someone is researching to find a cure for my type of dwarfism. It’s the same message that we get our whole lives – that there’s something wrong with you and we need to fix it. I don’t think I need to be fixed’
Director Dretzin calls Joe and Leah 'intrepid,' adding: ’I'm sure their kids are going to be very political and aware about all disability-related issues ... I find it hard to imagine there could be any real limit to what Joe and Leah could do'
Director Dretzin calls Joe and Leah ‘intrepid,’ adding: ’I’m sure their kids are going to be very political and aware about all disability-related issues … I find it hard to imagine there could be any real limit to what Joe and Leah could do’

It was an interesting project for Dretzin, she says, because she did not personally have any experience with anyone who had any type of disability.

‘I’m almost embarrassed to say I didn’t, because it’s unusual not to,’ she tells DailyMail.com. ‘I really didn’t. Obviously, I’ve had sort of chance encounters with people with disabilities, but I don’t have anybody intimately in my life who does [have a disability]. But you know, as a documentary filmmaker, that’s part of the reason I am a documentary filmmaker – is that I’m curious about people who are different from me in a way.’

She says she expects criticism for making the film as a non-disabled person, though ‘the people in the film don’t feel that way at all.

‘I think they all would stand up and really defend the process and the filmmakers,’ she tells DailyMail.com. ‘But we certainly do expect that there will be criticism of the fact that, for the most part, we are able-bodied filmmakers.’

She hopes, however, that the film prompts dialogue across a whole range of communities.

‘We’re in a political climate that’s [a bit] obsessed with otherness and differences and building walls, and I hope that the film has the impact on people that the book had on me,’ she says. ‘It was a very immersive experience, and I walked out of it – metaphorically speaking – and things looked different. I realized that a lot of my assumptions about people who looked different or acted different were really hollow, and that I felt kind of real openness.

‘And I think, based on the reactions that the film’s getting, that there’s a similar kind of impact. I really just hope that the film, in a political climate in which we’re really all about boundaries, I hope the film gives people some real hope that there’s another way to go.

‘Politically, and in every other way, it’s very easy for us to silo ourselves off from people who are different from us – and I think that’s happening everywhere,’ she says. ‘But the family, you can’t. You just can’t. And these are people who just are forced to confront differences in the most intimate of settings. And when you see how beautiful some of those connections they find to each other are … I think it gives you a lot of hope.’

80 COMMENTS

  1. Undeniably believe that which you stated. Your favourite justification seemed to be on the net the simplest factor to take into account of.
    I say to you, I definitely get irked whilst people consider issues that they just do not know about.
    You managed to hit the nail upon the top as neatly
    as defined out the whole thing without having side-effects
    , other people can take a signal. Will probably be again to get more.
    Thank you

  2. Wonderful beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your web site,
    how can i subscribe for a blog web site? The account helped me a
    acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit acquainted of this
    your broadcast offered bright clear idea

  3. Hello I am so excited I found your web site, I really found you by mistake, while I
    was researching on Digg for something else,
    Nonetheless I am here now and would just like to say thank you for a tremendous post and a all round entertaining blog (I also
    love the theme/design), I don’t have time to read through it all at the moment but I have saved it and also
    added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the
    excellent work.

  4. Howdy very nice site!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Amazing ..
    I will bookmark your web site and take the feeds additionally?
    I am happy to seek out numerous helpful information here within the post, we’d like work out more strategies on this regard, thank you for sharing.

    . . . . .

  5. I blog often and I seriously thank you for your information. Your article has truly
    peaked my interest. I will take a note of your site and
    keep checking for new details about once a week. I opted in for your Feed
    as well.

  6. Hello there, just became alert to your blog through Google, and found that
    it is really informative. I am going to watch out for brussels.
    I will appreciate if you continue this in future. A lot of
    people will be benefited from your writing. Cheers!

  7. You really make it appear so easy with your presentation however I to find this matter
    to be actually something which I believe I might by no means understand.
    It kind of feels too complex and extremely vast for me.

    I’m looking forward for your subsequent publish, I’ll try to get
    the dangle of it!

  8. Hello there, I discovered your blog by the use of Google while
    looking for a comparable topic, your website got here up, it
    appears to be like good. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.

    Hello there, simply turned into aware of your weblog via Google, and found that it is truly informative.

    I’m gonna be careful for brussels. I will be grateful if you continue this in future.
    Lots of other people will be benefited out of your writing.

    Cheers!

  9. hey there and thank you for your info – I have definitely picked up something new from right here.

    I did however expertise some technical issues using this
    site, as I experienced to reload the site many times
    previous to I could get it to load properly. I had been wondering if your hosting is OK?

    Not that I’m complaining, but slow loading instances times will sometimes
    affect your placement in google and could damage your high quality score if
    advertising and marketing with Adwords. Well
    I am adding this RSS to my e-mail and can look out for a lot more of
    your respective fascinating content. Ensure that you update
    this again very soon.

  10. Excellent weblog right here! Additionally your web site rather a
    lot up very fast! What web host are you the usage of?
    Can I am getting your associate hyperlink in your host?
    I wish my web site loaded up as fast as yours lol

  11. Hi! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted
    to give a quick shout out and say I genuinely enjoy reading through your articles.
    Can you suggest any other blogs/websites/forums that
    deal with the same subjects? Thanks!

  12. Link exchange is nothing else but it is simply placing the other person’s web site link on your page
    at suitable place and other person will also do similar in support of you.

  13. Hello There. I found your blog using msn. This is a very well written article. I’ll make sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post. I’ll certainly comeback.

  14. There are actually plenty of details like that to take into consideration. That may be a nice point to convey up. I supply the thoughts above as general inspiration but clearly there are questions just like the one you convey up the place crucial thing might be working in honest good faith. I don?t know if best practices have emerged round things like that, however I am certain that your job is clearly recognized as a good game. Each boys and girls really feel the impression of just a second’s pleasure, for the remainder of their lives.

  15. Does your site have a contact page? I’m having trouble locating it but, I’d like to shoot you an email. I’ve got some recommendations for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great blog and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.

  16. Hi! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog.

    Is it difficult to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal
    but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about setting up my
    own but I’m not sure where to start. Do you have any points or suggestions?
    Cheers

  17. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I want to suggest you some interesting things or advice. Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article. I wish to read more things about it!

  18. I would like to thank you for the efforts you have put in writing this website. I’m hoping the same high-grade blog post from you in the upcoming also. In fact your creative writing abilities has inspired me to get my own website now. Actually the blogging is spreading its wings rapidly. Your write up is a great example of it.

  19. I?¦m now not positive where you’re getting your information, however great topic. I must spend a while studying more or understanding more. Thank you for fantastic info I used to be searching for this information for my mission.

  20. I?¦ll immediately grab your rss feed as I can’t to find your e-mail subscription hyperlink or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Kindly allow me recognize so that I may just subscribe. Thanks.

  21. What i do not understood is in truth how you are now not actually much more smartly-liked than you may be now. You are very intelligent. You know therefore significantly when it comes to this topic, made me for my part consider it from a lot of varied angles. Its like men and women are not fascinated except it is one thing to do with Girl gaga! Your own stuffs excellent. Always handle it up!

  22. Thanks so much for giving everyone remarkably wonderful chance to check tips from this website. It can be very excellent and stuffed with a great time for me personally and my office mates to visit your blog a minimum of 3 times weekly to see the latest guides you have. And definitely, we’re usually fascinated concerning the brilliant ideas you serve. Certain 3 tips in this posting are unequivocally the most efficient we have had.

  23. A powerful share, I just given this onto a colleague who was doing just a little analysis on this. And he in reality purchased me breakfast because I found it for him.. smile. So let me reword that: Thnx for the deal with! However yeah Thnkx for spending the time to debate this, I really feel strongly about it and love studying more on this topic. If possible, as you turn into experience, would you mind updating your weblog with extra details? It’s highly useful for me. Massive thumb up for this weblog submit!

  24. When I originally commented I clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get four emails with the same comment. Is there any way you can remove me from that service? Thanks!

  25. Excellent post. I was checking continuously this blog and I’m impressed! Very helpful information particularly the last part 🙂 I care for such info much. I was looking for this particular information for a long time. Thank you and good luck.

  26. Do you mind if I quote a couple of your articles as long as I provide credit and sources back to your weblog? My blog site is in the exact same area of interest as yours and my visitors would definitely benefit from some of the information you provide here. Please let me know if this alright with you. Thanks!

  27. Good ?V I should definitely pronounce, impressed with your web site. I had no trouble navigating through all the tabs and related info ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it in the least. Quite unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or anything, site theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Nice task..

  28. Hi there! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any trouble with hackers? My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing many months of hard work due to no data backup. Do you have any methods to prevent hackers?

  29. My developer is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses. But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on a variety of websites for about a year and am worried about switching to another platform. I have heard very good things about blogengine.net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress content into it? Any help would be really appreciated!

  30. Hi there very cool website!! Man .. Beautiful .. Amazing .. I will bookmark your web site and take the feeds additionallyKI’m satisfied to seek out numerous helpful information right here in the post, we want work out more techniques in this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .

  31. I just want to mention I am just all new to weblog and actually liked this website. Probably I’m want to bookmark your website . You certainly have good article content. Thanks for revealing your webpage.

  32. This blog is definitely rather handy since I’m at the moment creating an internet floral website – although I am only starting out therefore it’s really fairly small, nothing like this site. Can link to a few of the posts here as they are quite. Thanks much. Zoey Olsen

  33. You really make it seem really easy along with your presentation however I find this topic to be really something that I think I’d by no means understand. It seems too complex and very wide for me. I’m taking a look forward to your subsequent post, I will attempt to get the hold of it!

  34. I wish to express my love for your kindness supporting people that absolutely need assistance with your matter. Your special dedication to getting the solution all around appears to be really valuable and have surely allowed guys and women like me to reach their endeavors. Your own useful tips and hints can mean this much a person like me and a whole lot more to my office colleagues. Thanks a ton; from each one of us.

  35. Thanks a lot for sharing this with all folks you really recognise what you are talking about! Bookmarked. Please additionally consult with my website =). We can have a link trade contract between us!

  36. I used to be more than happy to search out this internet-site.I needed to thanks for your time for this excellent read!! I definitely enjoying each little little bit of it and I’ve you bookmarked to check out new stuff you blog post.

  37. I have observed that charges for online degree specialists tend to be a great value. For instance a full Bachelors Degree in Communication from The University of Phoenix Online consists of 60 credits with $515/credit or $30,900. Also American Intercontinental University Online makes available Bachelors of Business Administration with a total program requirement of 180 units and a cost of $30,560. Online learning has made getting your higher education degree so much easier because you could earn your degree from the comfort of your home and when you finish working. Thanks for all your other tips I have learned through your web-site.

  38. Hey There. I found your blog using msn. This is an extremely well written article. I’ll make sure to bookmark it and return to read more of your useful info. Thanks for the post. I’ll definitely return.

  39. Oh my goodness! an incredible article dude. Thanks Nevertheless I am experiencing concern with ur rss . Don’t know why Unable to subscribe to it. Is there anybody getting an identical rss problem? Anybody who is aware of kindly respond. Thnkx

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here